I Was Thinking.......................

I appear to be highly organized.
I plan my outfits for the entire week.

I plan my weekly menu and grocery shopping every Sunday with the Grocery Game.

This is an example of the itinerary I send The Coach every Monday. 

Monday – salmon patties
Off
bank
groceries
5:45 – Saige art
6:00 - Ty Student Venture


Tuesday – bbq chicken
Am bike
After school swim
Carpool
4:30 get Saige
5:00 drop B and B
5:30 drop C and C

Wednesday – meatloaf and mashed potatoes
After school run
3:40 get Tanner from sectionals
4:00 get saige
Ty - track meet THS

Thursday -
Am bike
After school swim.
Ty – track meet
4:30 get saige
4:30 – Preeti and I are planning to take all kids to your game.
Kids to BG

Friday- beans
after school swim
After school run

Saturday – steak and shake
Am run
Am swim
Pick up your mom from airport

Sunday –
Am ride
Leave for spring break.

It appears that I am very organized, but really the only reason is that I do not trust myself to remember everything any other way. For instance, Today I did not check the itinerary I stayed at school grading papers and then went running.  Until Sweet Aunt called me and asked where I was.  I was supposed to pick up Saige - as I am supposed to do every Wednesday.

 Yesterday during the fifteen minute drive to the sitter's at 6:00 am Tayte asked me 26 questions.  I hadn't even had my coffee yet.

Here is a sampling of the questions Tayte will ask me at any given time.
* Are we going to the Monster Truck Jam today?
* Why isn't the sun up?
* Do you have breasts?
* Can I see your breasts?  (Yes.  It starts early.)
*  When will it be Christmas?
* What is this song about?
* Are we going to Monster Truck Jam today?
* Why does the dog have hair?
* Where is Gramma?
*  Are we going to the Monster Truck Jam tonight?

Maybe you are wondering how this relates.  Stay with me.

Those are just Tayte's questions.  Here are the other three talking kids' questions.
*What's for dinner?
*Can I go watch the volleyball game?
*What's for dinner?
*Can I drive?
*Will you take me to Academy?
*What's for dinner?
*Will you drive me around with the lawn mower so I can mow lawns to raise money for the American Cancer Society??????????????
*What's for dinner?

Here are some from my students.
*What is Hitler's last name?
*Where exactly is Oklahoma?
*Is all the stuff you teach us true?
*Does spelling count?

I can't remember the last complete thought I had uninterrupted by a question. I could maybe think of an idea for world peace if I could just think.  (Or I could remember where I left my Garmin.)

 Lately I have been getting ridiculed for things like forgetting to pick up my kids, leaving the garage door wide open when I leave the house, leaving my phone at home, losing track of time while I am running.................

Is this fair?  These thousands of questions are enough to drive me to distraction.  Is scatterbrained an accurate label for me, or would it be more fair to say I am ...................over questioned?

Have you forgotten anything important lately....like picking up your kids??
Got any better organizational ideas?

Attaboy!

So you all correctly deduced that it my bra I was trying to get out of the picture of Shaye Baby playing with the tub faucet.

It isn't just any bra. It is one of those Victoria Secret Incredible Bras. They are awesome.
I was skeptical when the saleslady had me try it on, but it is far more comfortable than any other bra I have ever worn.

At 45.00 I definitely balked at the price. That IS Victoria's Secret - she gets people addicted to expensive purple bras.
(Maybe one day I will buy another one so I don't have to rotate in the bra that is so uncomfortable I whip it off through my sleeve in the parking lot after work. A trick I learned from my mother.)

Do do you wonder WHY it was there?

Yes..we will be moving on from my underwear now.

I am going to divulge this to you because I want to know if I am the only who does this.

Every Sunday night I go into my closet and lay out my clothes out for the week. Yup.
I lay out five outfits complete with shoes, undies, jewelry, belts, ect. I put them in order Monday, Tuesday, Wedne..........well, you know the days of the week.
If it needs to ironed I iron it. If something that goes with it needs washing I throw it in the washer.
I have to make certain decisions like whether or not I want to wear a dress two days in a row. Also I only wear my highest heels on Thursdays because we have meetings that day and less classes.
I just don't want to go through this every night and I would rather just do it on Sunday.


Many people might ask, "What if you don't FEEL like wearing that outfit when you get up that morning." I guess I would ditch it, but that really doesn't happen. I don't spend a boatload of money on my clothes, but I like all the clothes I own. I feel like I am finally at a point in my life where I know what I like and what I think looks good and most importantly where I am not too terribly concerned if someone else thinks otherwise.

So...........that's why it was there.
Do you do the same thing?
Or...what organization quirks do you have?
Do you make your kids lay out their breakfast items the night before. (Pop-tarts put on the counter or cereal poured into a bowl with a spoon next to it.) I do.
I want to feel more normal and also I want to steal your ideas, so get going!

And here is a picture of my husband's side of the closet. He doesn't have to lay out his clothes. It is pretty easy to figure out which red shirt goes with which khaki pants.

Here is what you need for some hopping fun.

Boobies, Babies, and a Blog

Twee Poppets

Win at The Grocery Game

Works for Me Wednesday.
Today's theme at We Are That Family is asking for helpful tips. I had already written this and I need to do my hair, so I am just going to go ahead with it. Works for me!

I don't win at much. I don't win triathlons, or blog contests. Wah. But I do feel like I win at the grocery game. My friend introduced me to The Grocery Game a couple of years ago and I have used it since. We are a family of seven and in a typical week we spend 160.00 on groceries. We get all three meals a day at home. (G3 are occasionally at their dad's for dinner.) This figure includes food, toiletries, paper goods, laundry soap (lots and lots of laundry soap) and diapers for Shaye Baby. (It doesn't include other types of cleaning items as...I don't clean!)

The Grocery Game is a website that basically lets you know when a store has items on sale for the lowest price. At that time site tells you where to find the coupon for the item resulting in the largest savings. The idea is that at the time you will get the biggest savings you buy more than one of the item resulting in a stockpile of cheap groceries.

I have personally saved over 50% using The Grocery Game at the grocery store and more at drug stores.

Here is a recent example of my drug store receipt. (Please ignore the 3.50 I spent on candy and coke. I bribed oldest child to watch the babies while I shopped.) (It was worth it.) (I would do it again.)

Sure deoderant usually costs $5/2. This week there was a store coupon for $3/2. Then there were coupons in the paper for 1.50/1. Therefore the item was free. You can't beat free.

I won't go through each item, because you would all slip into a coma and I would be responsible for whatever chaos then took place at your house. But I bought all of these items for $30.3o. Plus I got back $5 dollars to use next week. That is a total savings of 64.65.

What I got - 4 shampoos, 4 body washes, 3 salmon, 2 deoderants, 2 packs razors, 1 creamer, 1 dishwashing thingies, 1 dryer bar, 1 toilet paper.


Now that I have done this for a while I am pretty quick at it. I like that I can make a computer generated list just by highlighting what items I need on the website. I also like saving money of course and having extra of stuff around the house. It has been nice on occasion to save enough money for things we wouldn't normally eat at home, like steak, and ribs. Plus I am occasionally able to afford "luxury items" that I wouldn't normally spring for like fancy shower gels.

I have heard criticisms from people who didn't like the method or did the same type thing by themselves without having to pay. (The charge is minimal. I think it is $5 for eight weeks, or something like that.) The trial though is only a dollar so it if it turns out this isn't for you, you can cancel and only be out a dollar.

Please know that this is just my unsolicited opinion. The Grocery Game is not paying me and neither is Sure deoderant. (Trust me no deoderant company would every ask us to endorse their product.)

How to do a Triathlon

Are you getting tired of the triathlon posts yet. Ok. I'm almost done.


Well people ask me all the time how I got started doing triathlons. Ok. No one has ever asked me that. I just volunteer the information to unsuspecting victims I meet at parties, or Sunday School Class. At least now I have an outlet where I can't see people looking around nervously for an escape.


Anyway, if someone did ask me how I got started here is how I would explain it.


I like to work out and I needed to lose some weight. I had been going to various exercise classes I enjoyed them ok. I kept passing by the spin class at the gym though and I really wanted to try it, but the participants all looked so fit. I was intimidated.


Finally I went and I quickly learned a few advantages spin class has over step class, or kick boxing.


1. If you screw up in spin class it rarely causes bruises.


2. It burns a mega ton of calories.


3. If you get tired you can secretly lower the resistance on the bike and just ACT like you are giving it your all.


4. Spin class doesn't cause me to wet my pants.


So I continued attending a 5:15 am spin class three days a week. Before long I realized they were all talking about triathlons and had even decided to start doing all three sports on Fridays. About this same time I had read an article describing how much more people were successful with their exercise programs if they had a goal other than total unattainable hotness. So, put two and two together and I had decided to tri.


I started off with a free basic schedule I got here and a cheap bike I got from Wal-mart. A bike doesn't have to cost a fortune. Running has always been a weak point for me. I believe I am just not suited to it. I to research the best running shoes for pigeon toed people. Then I was on my way.


The first day I ran SIX WHOLE MINUTES. Hey. You have to start somewhere and that was what the schedule called for. Good thing because that was my limit. The schedule started with six minutes of running and went up at 10% increments from there. I was better at the cycling and the swimming, but only slightly. I worked out six times a week and I threw in a couple of weights days a week easier at first because the cardio times were fairly short. None of this would have been possible if my husband hadn't been supportive. I don't think he really thought I would see this through and I definitely don't think he imagined me doing it almost three years later. (Minus time outs for two births and one miscarriage.) I scheduled my work out times around the family's needs and I learned not to stress out if I missed a day or two. I had plenty of time.


Next thing I knew...time was up. It was time for my first triathlon. It was a super sprint (which means it was really short. It doesn't not mean I went really fast.) Only women were allowed. The directions to the lake were terrible and it was pouring rain. I really thought we were going to miss it all together. My poor husband was so stressed about getting me there.



The conditions were terrible. Prior to showing up the one part I was not worried about was the 200m swim. Halfway through I thought I was going to drown. Then I thought I would welcome drowning. The water was ROUGH. I looked around and started to realize people were just getting through the swim however they could - dog paddle, backstroke. So I just did the same until I miraculously made it to shore.



Everyone was so nice and encouraging during the rest of the race. I didn't come in near first....or probably even in the middle, but I was hooked. It just felt like such an accomplishment.


I did three more triathlons that year before I realized I was accidentally pregnant with Shaye Baby. I tried to continue working out throughout the pregnancy, but I just really wasn't that motivated. In other non pregnant times I really enjoy doing the workouts, even the running. It's time alone and time to think. Time to listen to my own music. My clothes fit better. I get to be outside. And when do get injured it sounds much cooler to tell people I fell off my bike than it does to tell them I tripped over the step. And isn't that what it is really all about?

How to be Divorced

Ok. It is probably time to explain something about my family. Here goes.

Obviously there is a gap in age between my third and fourth kids.....the reason for this is......(drum roll)..........Two baby daddy.

That's right.
I was married.
I had three kids.
I got divorced.
I was single
I got married again.
I had two more kids.

There. Now you are all caught up. Due to a number of reasons I won't go into here my ex husband and I failed at marriage. We started splitting up when my oldest daughter was three months old. Things were rough for a while, but nowadays we get along 90% of the time and the rest of the time we fake it. He lives close by and the G3 (my three oldest) get to see him often, probably the main reason my kids remain happy and well adjusted even in the midst of a divorce.

I was on the phone with my best Oregon friend about a year after I got divorced griping and complaining about my ex. She said, "That's terrible. You should divorce him." She was no doubt tired of hearing my complaints and in her wisdom figured it wasn't doing me any good either. My reply was, "I did!" Which helped me remember- We were divorced. If he was late or hadn't brushed my daughter's hair - it really wasn't something I needed to throw a fit about. A great single parent program at church reinforced this. He wasn't going to change anything he didn't change while we were married. He took care of the kids adequately and that was all I needed to worry about. Everything else I needed to just let go.

I realize that my ex is probably better than some exes. He is employed and pays child support reliably. He gets the children when it is his weekend without fail. So I am certainly not trying to gloss over the very real problems of absentee parents, financial shortcomings, or abuse. It's just that I can only explain what I have experienced.

So, here is my (completely unsolicited) advice on "How to be Divorced".

1. Consolidate as many birthdays and holidays as possible.
2. Be flexible. If my ex wants to take the kids camping with friends, or I need them for an event, we trade. Make it easy for them to have fun with your ex spouse. Not hard.
3. Communicate. But not too much. If my ex knows about the upcoming band concert, or open house, then I have done my job, I don't also need to nag him about his attendance.
4. Let the kids learn about your ex spouse's short comings on their own. Just like they learn about yours.
5. Realize the organization between two households is hard. Sometimes things are going to have to be retrieved or dropped off at the other house. It is inevitable.
6. Do not ask your kids to relay messages. This applies to ALL messages, not just sticky subjects.
7. Realize that if you agreed on everything - you would probably still be married. My ex and I don't agree on the importance of learning a musical instrument, or how to handle my son's ADD. We definitely don't agree on fashion, food, or acceptable t.v. programs. If your kids are old enough teach them to do on their own what is truly important to you and learn to deal with the rest.
8. Give them the benefit of the doubt. I have learned the hard way that if my ex is refusing to pay for something it isn't because he is being selfish....it is because he is broke. If he is not being flexible about the schedule it is because he truly didn't realize I needed help.
9. Put your kids first. Period. That is what all this advice boils down to.
10. And if you are wondering how to implement all these changes without being run over by your ex, try this, Go First. Take the initiative to be agreeable and see what happens. Other than choking on your pride that is. Being divorced is stressful. There is no reason to add drama to it because of pride. Go first. Be nice for a month or so and see what happens and go from there.

Two disclaimers.
1. I currently have a wonderful second (and last) husband who from time to time has had to tell me I am being unreasonable about some topic. He reminds me occasionally about fairness and flexibility. He also does a great step dad balancing act, but that is a whole 'nother post.
2. I do not always adhere to these rules. I forget. I am not perfect. Now you know.

What do you think? If you are a successful half of a divorced couple, tell me what I left out.

Works for Me! - Allowance

I read somewhere allowance should be done one of two ways. 1. Do not give your kid allowance, but require them to do chores and just buy them stuff when necessary. 2. Give your kid allowance for chores, but do not buy them anything.

We decided to go with option 2. We do not buy our kids, toys, games, concession snacks at baseball, lunches or pay for non family outings. We do buy their school clothes and supplies and sports necessities at the start of every year within reason. For example we will pay up to fifty dollars for a pair of shoes, beyond that the kid must kick in his own cash.

Here is how we determine allowance. Each of the older three kids has a set of chores to be done daily. We don’t rotate the chores because want them to do their chore WELL. We have switched some due to age appropriateness, or slackerism. (Yes, that’s a word.) For their chores they get a certain amount of money - four, five seven dollars respectively. (Ty gets the seven dollars a week because he is the go to kid for spur of the moment “favors”. Plus we pay ten bucks a month for his cell phone.)

On Saturday we put their money in quarters in a jar with their name on it on the kitchen counter. Every time a chore is not done we take a quarter out. If they have done something that costs us money, like leave the bread or milk out, or leave socks on porch to be ruined we take out a quarter. At the end of the week they get what is left in their jar – in dollar bills. ( I recycle unearned money into the next weeks allowance.)

This is effective because removing the quarter is immediate. Throughout the week they can see into the jar if their allowance is dwindling. Occasionally I have allowed them to earn back some money, but it would have to be a pretty big extra job, like cleaning out the garage or something.

Here is the breakdown of chores.
Ty - 14
Let dog out and feed –am
Walk Saigie to neighbor - am
Unload dishwasher after school
Load dishwasher after dinner
Be kitchen “manager” after dinner
Mow lawn as needed (plus 5 dollars each time)

Tan-Man - 11
Walk and feed dog after school
Take out kitchen trash
Sweep floors and wipe counters after dinner
Clean dog poo from backyard on Friday
Take out trash M/Th

Saigie - 8
Entertain Tayte while I cook dinner (INVALUABLE!)
Clear and clean table after dinner
Pick up objects throughout house
Brush dog x2 a week

In addition to this they also take care of their own messes, put up laundry, make their lunches every night. (If they choose not to make their lunch they may buy lunch with their own money.)

Ideally we would have some sort of long term savings plan implemented for them, but we do not. Saigie is happy to spend her money on piddly items: snacks at baseball, and small gifts for family. Tanner will not buy a school lunch except on nacho day. He saves all his money for video games or skateboard stuff. Ty has kicked in money for shoes. He recently paid for his own phone update. I think it works out well and the kids now understand what I mean when I ask, “Is that what you choose to spend your money on?”

This method has helped us avoid any Wal-mart or Target melt downs that previously occurred when I bought (or didn’t buy) them items. Also it has been very helpful to me. I know who is supposed to do what. I also know after dinner I am done cleaning. Nice because by then I am exhausted and the babies need to be put to bed. They finish cleaning and I finish putting to bed at the same time and we can relax together.

It is not nearly as complicated as the length of this post implies. And IT WORKS FOR ME!!