So many kids, I don't know what to do.

Friday, December 17, 2010

Wedded Bliss

 Hey.  For the first time ever I am a guest blogger over at Mom Vs. the boys.   This is a charming blog.  It has all the good things, stories about sons, reviews, give aways, and even marshmallow snowmen.  What else could a chick need?  Head on over there while you are waiting for your cookies to burn bake. 

And now back to the show.

I have been trying to write a post to honor The Coach and my fifth anniversary. 

I considered writing about our first few dating experiences, but every time I try I remember my mom reads this blog.  Then I picture her hanging her head and muttering to herself, "I did the best I could with those kids."  I am able to picture this clearly because I have seen her do it before.  It's heartbreaking.  So in order not to offend Mom who skips kissing scenes in romance novels I decided to post the following conversation with The Coach.  I think it explains the romance in our marriage.

The Coach is often always gone doing coachery things and he misses happenings around house.  Missing stuff makes him nervous and sad, so he expects me to keep him clued in on everything that goes on in the house.  Nothing is too small.  His OCD/controlling perfectly normal self has been upset before over my failure to report squashing a spider, or maybe that the kids had to get their ball from the neighbor's yard. 
Here is a series of emails I got the other day after I forwarded a final exam review from one of Ty's teachers.

TC: Are you seriously sending this to me?
Me: I was just keeping you in the loop so I don't get in trouble for not informing you of things.  Crap!

TC:  Ha!
Me:  Yes.  Your OCD and control freakiness are hilarious.

TC: What would you do without my OCD?
Me:  Relax?  Drink less?   Your OCD is turning me into a wino.

TC: That is the first sign of alcoholism....blaming your problems on others.
Me: The second thing making me a wino is your judgementalness.

TC: Second sign of being an alcoholic...not listening to those who love you try to tell you that you are becoming an alcoholic.
Me: Hey. I am not an alcoholic.
       Alcoholics drink so much it harms their marriage. I drink to help our marriage.

TC: Third sign of an alcoholic...saying you're drinking it to make yourself or those around you feel better.
Me: Do you really think I am an alcoholic?

TC: Fourth sign is asking your spouse loaded questions
Me: Fine. I am an alcoholic. I can live with that.

TC: Fifth sign…….actually believing you are an alcoholic.
Me: Is the sixth sign no longer responding to your idiot spouse?

TC: I’m still responding to you!
Me: I have actual things to do.  Good bye.

TC: The sixth sign.............

Yes.  It is this kind of witty exchange that have made the past five years so wonderful.   

                                       (Engagement Pic.  Wedding album still packed.)

I love you, The Coach.  I know the sacrifices you made to marry me and my kids.   Not a lot of guys would have spent their early thirties that way.  (Yes babe, your early thirties are spent.)  I don't know what I would do without you...other than constantly lose my keys, my phone, my glasses, and my sense of humor.  I am so grateful to you have you around to nag me remind of important things.

Oh yeah and by the way. Yesterday the dog barked at a bird. I thought you would want to know.

Crud, my mom is still probably hanging her head thinking I drink a lot.  Mom, I don't drink a lot.) 



  1. I need a like button. *like* like* *like*

  2. I'm your newest follower from the Friend Finding Fridays blog hop! I would love for you to follow me back.

  3. Awesome! Sounds like any of a million conversations I've had with my husband...

  4. This post totally cracked me UP! Thanks for making my day!

    Have a great weekend, girl!!! :)

  5. Hey girl I read your guest post on Mom vs the Boys, and I had to come and visit your blog. I love meeting fellow boy-mamas. I have 4 boys...and sometimes my life is CRAZY! Can't wait to read more....Have a Merry Christmas!

  6. It's just a harmless drink...or mom reads about my vagina all the time, and she still manages to get out of bed in the morning...I think...?
    Congrats to you and the Coach. Yes, a man who will swoop in and micromanage is a keeper!

  7. How wonderful you found such a man. Thank you for coming by my blog and now will be following you.

  8. Happy annivesary...
    Stopped by to follow your blog from the Friend Finding Fridays blog hop... do comment/follow me back :-)
    Have a Happy Holiday Season!
    Positive Kismet Blog

  9. Drinking makes me a better mommy. And it's our fourth anniversary!

  10. Happy Anniversary! I agree with the coach, a little OCD is a good thing!

  11. Hello, just doing a little blog hopping during naptime :)

    I thought I'd stop by to let you know, I have 2 giveaways going on if you're interested - one is ending tonight: We Don't Have It All Together

  12. ha that sounds like the kind of banter D and I do, Love it :)

  13. Love your pictures! Drinking a little now and then is a must if you have kids! In response to your comment: I feel like stabbing myself when I listen to my husband's playlist too! :)


I always like to know someone is listening!